WELCOME TO THE WORLD EMERSON LOREN MILLER!!! BORN DECEMBER 1, 2009 TO CAITLIN AND LAVON MILLER. HE WAS ANXIOUS TO BE BORN AND CAME A WHOLE MONTH EARLY, WEIGHING ONLY 4 1/2 LBS. MOM AND DAD WENT TO COLORADO TO SEE HIM AND HE IS GAINING WEIGHT, NURSING BETTER AND IS REALLY WIGGLY! I CAN'T WAIT TO GO AND HOLD HIM!!!
Saturday, December 26, 2009
Thanksgiving 09
I decided to have thanksgiving at our house this year. My parent, Nick, Annika and Austin, and Grandma and Dave came. We had to set the table up in the li.ving room. It was squishy, but we managed to fit. There was not a single place left for anyone to sleep.
I love the picture with Austin and the Turkey! He was my helper that morning :/ .
I know that it is already past christmas, but I found a great way to post pictures quickly to my blog...
So I have a lot of catch up blogging to do....
Saturday, May 30, 2009
Hey there!
I haven't posted anything for a very long time. I guess I've been so preoccupied
with other things. I have a hard time staying inside when it's been so nice out.
CHURCH
We are hosting church at our house tomorrow since 2 of the larger families in our group are going to Auburn for a baptism. Our house is so tiny, so it is a little bit impractical to have church here. If it's nice out I thought we could go to the park to have lunch.
WEATHER
We have been having alot of afternoon thunderstorms here. Nevada county has warnings for severe weather. I wouldn't mind if it would rain a little here, but PLEASE don't hail! I have been working way to hard in my garden and things are looking sooo nice.
MY BABIES
And my little babies are getting really big. They really are quite intertaining and are getting hard to catch. I let them out in the yard and they just eat bugs and things and sleep under the porch. Recently I needed to leave so into the box they needed to go. I caught all but the biggest one, Howard :). I simply could NOT catch him! Fine! so I left him for a short time seperated from his brother and sisters. When I came back outside he simply waddled up to me as if he were asking to be put into the box with the others! He did not try to run away this time. :) It was very comical.
As many of you know Will and I have not been able to have a baby yet. This has been somewhat of a struggle for me. Oddley, but standing to reason, hatching these little fellow seems to have satisfied that mothering instict in me. I would suggest to anyone who might be struggling with the same thing to try something like this. Maybe it's silly, but it sure has brought me joy!
MOM AND DAD
We also recently went up to Alturas to visit Mom and Dad. Their place is lovely. They work everyday planting trees and adding things out in the yard. Mom recently told me that she got a bike and has been riding it to work. Way to go Mom!!
FRESH FISH AND LES SCHWAB
And William... is fishing. :) It is his new summer obsession. (I am glad)
He found a great fishing hole and has been bringing home loads of fish. I found a great way to cook them. Simply place cleaned fish in a baking dish, add a cup of water, slice some lemons and put them inside the fish with a couple slabs of butter and salt and pepper. Do the same on top, bake at 350 uncovered for 15 minutes and wallah!
Unfortunatly Les Schwab is low on work so they needed to lay the new guy, William off. Thankfully it gives Will a chance to get caught up with his window clients. And he is on call in case they get busy.
I am proud of his accomplishments. The other day a customer called just to thank him for the great job that he did on their windows. This really blessed me.
So that's about it for now... I have been trying to not download my pictures straight onto our computer and need to figure out how to get them on CD. So my apologize for not having to many new pics on. I have so many I'd love to share, but you'll just have to bear with me I guess.
Well, by for now...
Alexis
with other things. I have a hard time staying inside when it's been so nice out.
CHURCH
We are hosting church at our house tomorrow since 2 of the larger families in our group are going to Auburn for a baptism. Our house is so tiny, so it is a little bit impractical to have church here. If it's nice out I thought we could go to the park to have lunch.
WEATHER
We have been having alot of afternoon thunderstorms here. Nevada county has warnings for severe weather. I wouldn't mind if it would rain a little here, but PLEASE don't hail! I have been working way to hard in my garden and things are looking sooo nice.
MY BABIES
And my little babies are getting really big. They really are quite intertaining and are getting hard to catch. I let them out in the yard and they just eat bugs and things and sleep under the porch. Recently I needed to leave so into the box they needed to go. I caught all but the biggest one, Howard :). I simply could NOT catch him! Fine! so I left him for a short time seperated from his brother and sisters. When I came back outside he simply waddled up to me as if he were asking to be put into the box with the others! He did not try to run away this time. :) It was very comical.
As many of you know Will and I have not been able to have a baby yet. This has been somewhat of a struggle for me. Oddley, but standing to reason, hatching these little fellow seems to have satisfied that mothering instict in me. I would suggest to anyone who might be struggling with the same thing to try something like this. Maybe it's silly, but it sure has brought me joy!
MOM AND DAD
We also recently went up to Alturas to visit Mom and Dad. Their place is lovely. They work everyday planting trees and adding things out in the yard. Mom recently told me that she got a bike and has been riding it to work. Way to go Mom!!
FRESH FISH AND LES SCHWAB
And William... is fishing. :) It is his new summer obsession. (I am glad)
He found a great fishing hole and has been bringing home loads of fish. I found a great way to cook them. Simply place cleaned fish in a baking dish, add a cup of water, slice some lemons and put them inside the fish with a couple slabs of butter and salt and pepper. Do the same on top, bake at 350 uncovered for 15 minutes and wallah!
Unfortunatly Les Schwab is low on work so they needed to lay the new guy, William off. Thankfully it gives Will a chance to get caught up with his window clients. And he is on call in case they get busy.
I am proud of his accomplishments. The other day a customer called just to thank him for the great job that he did on their windows. This really blessed me.
So that's about it for now... I have been trying to not download my pictures straight onto our computer and need to figure out how to get them on CD. So my apologize for not having to many new pics on. I have so many I'd love to share, but you'll just have to bear with me I guess.
Well, by for now...
Alexis
Monday, May 11, 2009
Another day...
Will and I spent the evening yesterday with his cousin Daniel and girlfriend Taegen. We went to her church at Living Stones in Reno. A converted Muslim man preached about the difference between trying to live our lives to perfection to please God or applying the blood of Jesus' Sacrifice, by faith and being perfect through Him. The muslim faith is about works, but Christianity is about accepting a "work" that was already done for us. The result of accepting this work is a life of love and sacrifice because of what he has done for us... if we love God we will keep his commandments, if we love God we will love the brethren.
We got somethig to eat and had a good time hanging out and getting to know Taegen. She is a very happy, talkative, lovely person. Daniel really lights up around her.
Came home and conked out.
And today.... guess I'll try to bake some cookies - ginger snaps! Don't really know what else I'll do, but am happy for the new day!
We got somethig to eat and had a good time hanging out and getting to know Taegen. She is a very happy, talkative, lovely person. Daniel really lights up around her.
Came home and conked out.
And today.... guess I'll try to bake some cookies - ginger snaps! Don't really know what else I'll do, but am happy for the new day!
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
A Poem - by Sarah
Wonder
I can’t quite wrap my mind around
The story of creation.
Nor can I comprehend in full
Your wonderful salvation!
Too great for me to understand;
I read your wondrous story.
My God; you are my awesome God!
Died? For me to be set free?
I look at you with endless awe.
My thoughts are admiration.
Oh how can I express my thanks
For your most true creation?
I will live for your glory Lord;
And tell my friends and brothers:
Repent and serve the one true God,
Whose name’s above all others!
Oh, your love is too amazing.
Your love is so eternal.
I could try my utmost – best—
I can’t explain supernal!!!
Sarah Suzanne Greenwood
I can’t quite wrap my mind around
The story of creation.
Nor can I comprehend in full
Your wonderful salvation!
Too great for me to understand;
I read your wondrous story.
My God; you are my awesome God!
Died? For me to be set free?
I look at you with endless awe.
My thoughts are admiration.
Oh how can I express my thanks
For your most true creation?
I will live for your glory Lord;
And tell my friends and brothers:
Repent and serve the one true God,
Whose name’s above all others!
Oh, your love is too amazing.
Your love is so eternal.
I could try my utmost – best—
I can’t explain supernal!!!
Sarah Suzanne Greenwood
A Letter From Grace!
This is not Alexis! I guess that is a fitting way to start!
This is Grace, I am Alexis' cousin-in-law!
I just uploaded all the new pictures from my computer. BTW Alexis is at my house. I did not somehow get her password and am writing on her blog!
My cousin is William. My mom and his mom are sisters.
Today I baked bread with Alexis, made peanut butter and did lots of laundry!
I don't know why or what else to write, so i will blog off now!
Here is some advice-----be friendly!
love Grace
Monday, May 4, 2009
My Wonderful Friend and Sister-in-Law!!!
Here's to Bonnie! My beautiful friend, Sister in Jesus, sister-in-law, enemy (just kidding) and shopping comrade! My life would be very, very dull without her. After all I wouldn't have anybody to tell me 4 hour dreams, anyone to spaz on me and give me bruises, anyone to read me really long poems about weird things, anyone to tell me all about the boys she likes, or have anyone to shop at night with.
I remember when William and I were dating and I lived with their family. Bonnie and I started out sharing a room and realized that it was not a smart thing to do. I ended up bunking with Bernice on the top bunk in the little girls room since that made for a little more peace and sanity. Boy oh boy am I glad that stage is over. We used to fight soooooo much. I am really glad that we both have matured and are able to be close as sisters now.
She is 17 and I am 26. It's weird to remember when she was a little girl and used to hug me after church. I wonder how the future will be for us? William was married at 18 and Bonnie is only a year away from that. I guess I don't really see that happening anytime soon, but I do hope she finds a great man. Someone who has a lot of time to listen and can put up with being "oodied"! :)
Caitlin...
Well sorry to disappoint every one, but I am NOT pregnant... Yes I have been sick, but only with a weird respiratory thing! But... Caitlin is! This is very exciting, but very scary. She seems to be doing all right and is excited. I told her that she needs to really try to have a positive outlook. I am a believer that how we view things mentally can affect our physical body.
The reason this is such big news to us is that last year, in October, Caitlin gave birth to Gavin, a very small but beautiful little boy. He was too premature to make it through the birth. This was a very sad time for our family. She is not 100% certain as to what caused her to go into labour at 51/2 months, but is going to go to a better doctor. I pray that this pregnancy will go smoothly. So... this is the news. But when I do get pregnant, do know that I will tell... :)
The reason this is such big news to us is that last year, in October, Caitlin gave birth to Gavin, a very small but beautiful little boy. He was too premature to make it through the birth. This was a very sad time for our family. She is not 100% certain as to what caused her to go into labour at 51/2 months, but is going to go to a better doctor. I pray that this pregnancy will go smoothly. So... this is the news. But when I do get pregnant, do know that I will tell... :)
Sunday, May 3, 2009
La De Da....
Sure isn't much going on today. I am home and Will went to church. I haven't been feeling the greatest so here I am!
I went to a woman's retreat at the Baptist Station yesterday. Was very enjoyable and I was glad to get to know some other women.
It is raining. I love the rain!
Oh and our turkey started laying eggs... quite a surprise! Not sure what turkey eggs taste like...
And that is about it...
Oh and I do have other news....
But maybe I will wait a few days to write about it.... :) ????
I went to a woman's retreat at the Baptist Station yesterday. Was very enjoyable and I was glad to get to know some other women.
It is raining. I love the rain!
Oh and our turkey started laying eggs... quite a surprise! Not sure what turkey eggs taste like...
And that is about it...
Oh and I do have other news....
But maybe I will wait a few days to write about it.... :) ????
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Good Bye Yellow Truck, Good Bye!!!
I am amazed at God's timing in our lives. Today I was just pondering how to pay our 226.00 car insurance payment (don't ask) and a man called who was interested in the junkie yellow truck that is sitting in our yard. Whoopie! They came out to look at it and offered a hundred bucks. RIGHT ON! A hundred bucks sure is better than having to look at that thing everyday. I probably would have just given it to them for all that, but we did put some money into it... and we do have bills....
We bought that yellow bannana when our car was broke down and Will needed a truck. It did run great until... an oil leak that was worse than realized caused the engine to run out of oil! Bang, Bump, Stop!!! That was not fun. Another one of our vehicles on the side of the road!
I think our landlords will be appreciating this.... :)
So farewell, adeiu, adios and GOODBYE old yellow truck!
WHY THE WIND??
In the Sierra Valley we are plagued with perpetual wind. I am really starting to get annoyed. In the winter freezing cold wind finds its way into every little crack and cranny of the house. Tarps get blown off of things, and shed doors get blown open. We are always cold. In the summer hot, dry winds make it almost impossible to keep things watered. Everything is STATIC! Laundry gets blown off the line and it certainly does not help to keep wild fires in check. And then in Spring, like today, I finally think it's going to be a lovely day after being cooped up inside for 2 days(Because it's to darn windy and cold outside!). By the time I get around to getting in the garden to plant some seeds the winds picks up. Who wants to be outside with freezing gusts blowing at your back? I wouldn't be surprised if our neighbors think I am insane for yelling at the wind! "GO AWAY!!!! WE DON'T NEED YOU EVERYDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I suppose there must be some practical reason for it.... I'm not seeing it.....
I am trying to think of somewhere to live that does NOT act like this... Any suggestions?
I suppose there must be some practical reason for it.... I'm not seeing it.....
I am trying to think of somewhere to live that does NOT act like this... Any suggestions?
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Riley Dog!
When Will's family dog Blue had puppies I just had to have one. Of course I really didn't need a dog over that time. I was teaching school and living with a family, but nevertheless I picked one out. He had to have blue eyes like his mama. I named him Riley and he lived with Will's family until we got married. And today he is very much a part of our little family. He really is a good dog. Every now and again he'll cause some trouble (like impregnating the neighbor dog, or having our neighbor man call the sheriff on us, or falling out of the truck bed!) but for the most he really is a "good boy". This morning I found him just chowing on a ground squirrel! Nasty, but at least I don't have to worry about them eating my garden! I hesitated to let him in the house, but he didn't seem to have any adverse affects from eating it. No wonder he seems to be getting a little fatter. Yuck!
Saturday, April 25, 2009
Hasty Words - an article from Above Rubies
Psalm 31:22, "I said in my haste, I am cut off from before thine eyes: nevertheless thou heardest the voice of my supplications when I cried unto thee." How easy it is to say things in haste! We spout off before we think. And usually when we speak hastily it is out of reaction. We often don't even believe the words we say! But sad to say, we have said them, and words have power! They have power to hurt our husband and hurt our children. Charles Spurgeon says, "Hasty words are but for a moment on the tongue, but they often lie for years on the conscience." I remember with shame an incident that happened in the early days of our marriage. I felt hurt by words my husband spoke to me and hastily retorted, "You should have married someone else!" Fortunately I have a husband who doesn't let things go uncovered. He came to me a little while later and said, "Do you believe in the power of words?" "Yes," I muttered. "Well, you better take back what you said," he stated firmly. I realized he was right and I had to retract and confess my hasty words. Hasty words are often words of doubt because we have not given time for faith to grow or to wait for God to move. We often have to wait for God. David cries out that he is cut off from the Lord, but he soon finds that they were hasty words as God had heard his cry all along. We must give God time to answer. His timing and His way is always the best way. I cringe when I hear folk speaking derogatively against the Lord because things are not going the way they want. Again Spurgeon says, "Unbelief will have a corner of the heart of the firmest believer, and out of that corner it will vent many spiteful things against the Lord if the course of providence be not quite so smooth as nature might desire. Forever be such dark suspicions banished from our minds." Proverbs 29:20 is also a challenging Scripture, "Seest thou a man who is hasty in his words? There is more hope of a fool than him." And Ecclesiastes 5:2, "Be not rash with thy mouth, and let not thine heart be hasty to utter any thing before God: for God is in heaven, and thou upon earth: therefore let thy words be few." How true it is that the more words we speak the more opportunity to sin. (Read Proverbs 10:19; 17:28) So, how do we stop these hasty words? James 1:19 says, "Let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath." Yes, we want to be "slow to speak" but how do we do it? I believe we have to get into the habit of doing it. Each time that someone (especially husband or children) rubs you up the wrong way, shut your mouth. Wait before you speak. If you can't think of anything positive to say, don't say anything. That's what Jesus did. When they accused him, He answered nothing. He didn't even open his mouth. (Matthew 27:13-14) Is that the hardest thing you've ever tried to do? You can do it if you will to do it. And especially as you pray about it and ask the Lord to help you. Yes, you will fail. But keep working on making it a habit of your life. Some people say it takes 30 days to break a habit. Some say it takes 21 days to establish a habit. However, some habits may take a lot longer. Never despair. Keep trying and keep looking to the Lord who is your source. He lives in you and He is full of self control. (Galatians 5:22-23) Continually ask the Holy Spirit to work in your heart and your tongue. He will work His grace in you. Proverbs 4:23, "Keep thy heart with all diligence: for out of it are the issues of life." Love from NANCY CAMPBELL
PRAYER: "Lord, please help me not to be hasty in my words. Help me to trust you in each situation rather than reacting out of my emotions. Amen."
AFFIRMATION: My words determine the course of my life and my family. Many women like to save these devotions. They print them out and keep them in a folder to read over and over again. Some print them out and pin them on the fridge with a magnet to read through the week. If you are printing this devotion and need it to be smaller, highlight and change to a smaller font. If you know others who would be blessed by these devotions, you are welcome to forward them or let them know they can subscribe by sending a blank email to subscribers-on@aboverubies.org
PRAYER: "Lord, please help me not to be hasty in my words. Help me to trust you in each situation rather than reacting out of my emotions. Amen."
AFFIRMATION: My words determine the course of my life and my family. Many women like to save these devotions. They print them out and keep them in a folder to read over and over again. Some print them out and pin them on the fridge with a magnet to read through the week. If you are printing this devotion and need it to be smaller, highlight and change to a smaller font. If you know others who would be blessed by these devotions, you are welcome to forward them or let them know they can subscribe by sending a blank email to subscribers-on@aboverubies.org
My Mom and Dad
My mom and dad are coming today! Yeah! They moved back to Alturas a few months ago, so now it's my turn to be near them.
My nephew, Austin (Nick and Annika's boy) spent a week with them awile back. Dad told Mom to forget any notion she might have for adoption! :) Since Mom works at the hospital, Dad had the brunt of entertaining him. He is a lively guy who likes to talk! Dad said he couldn't go anywhere without him trailing behind him. Even to the bathroom! "Grandpa? Grandpa?"
So tonight I guess we'll barbeque and just hang out.
Friday, April 24, 2009
EPEDEMIC
I just heard about the flu in Mexico City that left some dead. Many schools, libraries, museums etc were closed. "Health officials around the world are concerned about an epidemic". Wow. Read this, the words of Jesus when His disciples asked him what would be the signs of his coming:
"Take heed that no one deceives you. For many will come in My name, saying, I am the Christ, and will deceive many. And you will hear of wars and rumors of wars. See that you are not troubled; for all these things must come to pass, but the end is not yet. For nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. And there will be famines, pestilence, and earthquakes in various places. All these are the beginning of sorrows...they will deliver you up to tribulation and kill you, and you will be hated by all nations for My name's sake...the love of many will grow cold. But he who endures to the end shall be saved. " Matthew 24:4-13 NKJV
I wish I could write it all here, but I guess you'll just have to read it yourselves.:) When things like this come up it's always a reminder to look up for our redemtion draws nigh!
I have this verse framed in my living room that reads, "Be diligent that ye may be found of Him in peace - without spot and blameless!" 2 Peter 2:14
To be at peace with Jesus! and without spot and blamesss! We must daily cleanse our lives of sin and go on to perfection! EVEN SO COME LORD JESUS!
"Take heed that no one deceives you. For many will come in My name, saying, I am the Christ, and will deceive many. And you will hear of wars and rumors of wars. See that you are not troubled; for all these things must come to pass, but the end is not yet. For nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. And there will be famines, pestilence, and earthquakes in various places. All these are the beginning of sorrows...they will deliver you up to tribulation and kill you, and you will be hated by all nations for My name's sake...the love of many will grow cold. But he who endures to the end shall be saved. " Matthew 24:4-13 NKJV
I wish I could write it all here, but I guess you'll just have to read it yourselves.:) When things like this come up it's always a reminder to look up for our redemtion draws nigh!
I have this verse framed in my living room that reads, "Be diligent that ye may be found of Him in peace - without spot and blameless!" 2 Peter 2:14
To be at peace with Jesus! and without spot and blamesss! We must daily cleanse our lives of sin and go on to perfection! EVEN SO COME LORD JESUS!
Snow!
Last week was awesome! It was really feeling like summer was near. Spring fever really starts to take hold when it is as nice as that outside. And this morning? Snow! I wondered how long this was gonna take... nice big fluffy flakes were coming down and started covering the ground. And then.... TADA! the sun broke through! Hurray!!!!!!
Thursday, April 23, 2009
The Greenwoods
Today I'm hanging out with Grace and the kids while Will's Aunt Leslie and Uncle Jeff go to San Francisco. We're making egg rolls and broccoli beef for dinner. Yum!
Life would NOT be the same without them! There are: Tom, Daniel, Hannah, James, Grace, Sarah, Seth, Mary, Ruth, Joe and last but not least Peter. So life has a lot happening for them.
Jeff and Leslie gave their lives and the happenings of their lives to God and the results: a full quiver! God bless their endeavors!
Life would NOT be the same without them! There are: Tom, Daniel, Hannah, James, Grace, Sarah, Seth, Mary, Ruth, Joe and last but not least Peter. So life has a lot happening for them.
Jeff and Leslie gave their lives and the happenings of their lives to God and the results: a full quiver! God bless their endeavors!
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Summoned for Jury Duty
I received my summons a couple of weeks ago to appear at court in Quincy today. I've had a couple of weird dreams concerning it too. The other night I dreamt that I was in this court case and ended up being on the bad side... and turned into a criminal! Nobody suspected that I was involved in a horrendous crime. But... I eventually had to turn myself in! I could not live with that lie! Weird... anyways...
Of course I was a little late getting there. Will kept telling me that it only takes 30 minutes to get there. NOT TRUE! Thankfully people were still getting settled. Funny thing that of all the strange and unfamiliar people there, an open seat happened to be next to a friend and old neighbor, Darlene Stout.
This summons was not for jury for a crime case, but a call for people to volunteer to be on the Grand Jury for our county. It is a one year term and involves going over things that go on in the county. They meet several times a month. We had to wait very long. And since I was late getting there I was second to last to be interviewed. Not bad, only I felt really lame for not volunteering, especially since I do have the time and it would have been interesting. As a Christian it is a hard call to know what are the right things to do. Especially when it comes to government and our duty as citizens. I do know that I am called to pray for our government. I know that the most important thing is to help change hearts and give hope to people through Jesus. I cannot change the things that are prophesied in God's Word. Governments will be corrupted; Persecution of believers will happen; Jesus WILL return. Will there be a time when our loyalties and what we believe will be tested against the tide of worldly thinking?
Darlene made a remark that I thought was very thought provoking. We can hasten the coming of the Lord by preaching the gospel. He will not come until everybody has heard. Have you?
Of course I was a little late getting there. Will kept telling me that it only takes 30 minutes to get there. NOT TRUE! Thankfully people were still getting settled. Funny thing that of all the strange and unfamiliar people there, an open seat happened to be next to a friend and old neighbor, Darlene Stout.
This summons was not for jury for a crime case, but a call for people to volunteer to be on the Grand Jury for our county. It is a one year term and involves going over things that go on in the county. They meet several times a month. We had to wait very long. And since I was late getting there I was second to last to be interviewed. Not bad, only I felt really lame for not volunteering, especially since I do have the time and it would have been interesting. As a Christian it is a hard call to know what are the right things to do. Especially when it comes to government and our duty as citizens. I do know that I am called to pray for our government. I know that the most important thing is to help change hearts and give hope to people through Jesus. I cannot change the things that are prophesied in God's Word. Governments will be corrupted; Persecution of believers will happen; Jesus WILL return. Will there be a time when our loyalties and what we believe will be tested against the tide of worldly thinking?
Darlene made a remark that I thought was very thought provoking. We can hasten the coming of the Lord by preaching the gospel. He will not come until everybody has heard. Have you?
Friday, April 17, 2009
Read This Story!!
Loving the Rapist's Child - Part 1
I thought keeping her would be a painful reminder of my attacker. Then God began to heal.By Heather Gemmen as told to Susan Parsons
It had been more than a year since Casey was stillborn, and it seemed Steve and I would never be able to have the third child we wanted so badly. Every passing month brought disappointment. I sat in the doctor's waiting room, like so many times before. The nurse was used to seeing me there. She knew how hard we had tried since losing Casey. I guess that's why she just couldn't resist giving me a sly grin while practically singing her words, "The doctor will be right with you … and I think you'll like what she has to say." The poor thing had no idea what I was really going through. The doctor came in to share my dilemma. I was pregnant all right. And neither of us was smiling. We both knew that I had been raped. What should have been glorious news instead brought devastation of heart, and memories of a brutal attack by a total stranger. I relived the night it happened. Steve had gone to church for a late-night meeting. I was so tired. The boys were tucked in, and I had gone to bed before Steve left. Sometime later, the light came on in our room. "Honey, turn off the light," I muttered in a sleepy grog. The light went out, but there was a sense that he was just standing there in the dark, and that was annoying. I opened my eyes to see the shadowy figure of a man in the doorway. It was not my husband. I bolted up in bed but was promptly warned not to make a sound. Thinking of my two small sons, I complied. But the next moments were excruciating in every sense. At first I wailed, I begged; I offered to pray for the stranger who controlled my body, my life. But with a knife at my throat and threats aimed at my children, I silently endured a humiliating violation of my person. I was raped within the darkened walls of my own home-in the bed I shared with my husband. Aloud, I asked God to forgive the man, and for a moment he stopped-I wondered whether he was feeling conviction for his sin and was going to leave me alone, or kill me. He did neither. He resumed his attack. The trauma of rape is great. The horrifying moment grasped and exposed every hidden thing in my heart and life, from the present personal shame to deep-seated inferiority, and even the growing marital discord between Steve and me. Rape exacerbates these things, and chips away at anything that is out of order or not built on solid ground. To have my doctor tell me that I had conceived was like hearing a judge sentence me to carry a lifelong reminder of the rape. My trust in God began to tremble.'What will people say?' It's easy to chant pro-life songs when you're standing in front of an abortion clinic holding a cardboard sign. But the melody is different when you're on the other side of the poster, faced with the reality that your life is about to change dramatically—forever.
I thought keeping her would be a painful reminder of my attacker. Then God began to heal.By Heather Gemmen as told to Susan Parsons
It had been more than a year since Casey was stillborn, and it seemed Steve and I would never be able to have the third child we wanted so badly. Every passing month brought disappointment. I sat in the doctor's waiting room, like so many times before. The nurse was used to seeing me there. She knew how hard we had tried since losing Casey. I guess that's why she just couldn't resist giving me a sly grin while practically singing her words, "The doctor will be right with you … and I think you'll like what she has to say." The poor thing had no idea what I was really going through. The doctor came in to share my dilemma. I was pregnant all right. And neither of us was smiling. We both knew that I had been raped. What should have been glorious news instead brought devastation of heart, and memories of a brutal attack by a total stranger. I relived the night it happened. Steve had gone to church for a late-night meeting. I was so tired. The boys were tucked in, and I had gone to bed before Steve left. Sometime later, the light came on in our room. "Honey, turn off the light," I muttered in a sleepy grog. The light went out, but there was a sense that he was just standing there in the dark, and that was annoying. I opened my eyes to see the shadowy figure of a man in the doorway. It was not my husband. I bolted up in bed but was promptly warned not to make a sound. Thinking of my two small sons, I complied. But the next moments were excruciating in every sense. At first I wailed, I begged; I offered to pray for the stranger who controlled my body, my life. But with a knife at my throat and threats aimed at my children, I silently endured a humiliating violation of my person. I was raped within the darkened walls of my own home-in the bed I shared with my husband. Aloud, I asked God to forgive the man, and for a moment he stopped-I wondered whether he was feeling conviction for his sin and was going to leave me alone, or kill me. He did neither. He resumed his attack. The trauma of rape is great. The horrifying moment grasped and exposed every hidden thing in my heart and life, from the present personal shame to deep-seated inferiority, and even the growing marital discord between Steve and me. Rape exacerbates these things, and chips away at anything that is out of order or not built on solid ground. To have my doctor tell me that I had conceived was like hearing a judge sentence me to carry a lifelong reminder of the rape. My trust in God began to tremble.'What will people say?' It's easy to chant pro-life songs when you're standing in front of an abortion clinic holding a cardboard sign. But the melody is different when you're on the other side of the poster, faced with the reality that your life is about to change dramatically—forever.
Loving the Rapist's Child - Part 2
I guess that's why I took the Ovral. Ovral is a pill that prevents a fertilized egg from implanting itself into the womb. It's regularly given to rape victims, quite literally to keep a potential life from taking hold. My doctor gave me the Ovral, emphasizing the impracticality of raising a child of rape, and bringing up the "just a blob of cells" line more than once. Realizing that a fertilized egg was a human embryo, I refused at first, citing that it was potentially the same as abortion. But a surprising majority of Christian friends and family members sided with the doctor. My pastor. My mother. Steve. We were all repeatedly reminded that pregnancy was a long shot and that taking the Ovral was just a precaution, just to ease my mind. The case for taking the preventative was capped with reminders that the child would not look like Steve. She would be half African American. "People will think you cheated!" "You'll see that man's face in that child every day!" "Do you want to tell the world you were raped? Because that's what you'll have to do." I took the Ovral before the 72-hour window had closed. Then I tried to forget about it. Of course, that was impossible with the impending fear of aids and the growing animosity between Steve and me. And then, to my dismay, we discovered that the Ovral hadn't worked. I was pregnant. It seemed my world had fallen apart, and the journey to a normal life would take a much longer time than I thought. Perhaps I would never overcome this.No easy fix Thank God, I didn't test hiv positive, but my doctor still advised a six-month abstinence from intimacy with Steve, until we were certain that the virus was not lurking in my body. The abstinence didn't bother me at all, since I had no interest in intimacy. We decided we should let the child be adopted, and spare ourselves all the added strain of trying to love and raise a reminder of the vicious attack. We even began making arrangements with a kind couple in our church who desperately wanted a baby. God seemed so distant, so cold. Why had he allowed me to be raped in my own home as my babies slept in the next room? And why had he allowed my third child to be conceived in this way, instead of within the sanctity of marriage, as Steve and I had planned? It seemed like a cruel joke. But God was there. Although sin had its run, God was there. We just had to be reminded that He is not a God of easy fixes.
Loving the Rapist's Child - Part 3
Surprised by beauty
Steve and I became desperate, and sometimes it's that human desperation that drives us to God. We know Him; we love Him; we say we trust Him. But sometimes we don't cleave to Him as the lover of our souls until we find ourselves completely helpless. As for the fairness of being victimized, we have to realize that ever since sin began there have been victims. Cain slew Abel (Gen. 4:1-8). Amnon raped Tamar (2 Sam. 13:1-22). But what should the victims and their families do with their pain? Do they resort to their own devices, or do they give it to God and His will? Steve and I initially resorted to our own devices by trying to prevent a life that we thought would be inconvenient, given the circumstances. We could never love the attacker's child, we reasoned. So we put our own hand to the situation. But God loved us enough to thwart our plans. Gradually, as the child in my body grew, both Steve and I began to change. It was a spiritual work, and we knew it. We grew attached to the little life inside me and delighted in its movements, just as we had marveled at the evidence of life when I carried Chad and Simon. This child was alive! It was a miracle that the child had escaped death. It became clear that the baby was God's child first, and it was as innocent as those conceived any other way. We grew astonished and ashamed that we could have ever imagined not keeping the baby. We continually repented of our lack of trust in God; of putting our hand to the situation when it should have been left to God all along, and when we discovered the child was a girl, it became even more special. I particularly had wanted a daughter. The adoption was off. When Rachael was born, a light went on in our family. We learned the true meaning of the Father's love. He looks upon us with more than acceptance-He embraces us wholeheartedly, because He has called us His children. "For you did not receive the spirit of bondage again to fear, but you received the Spirit of adoption by whom we cry out, 'Abba, Father'" (Rom. 8:15, NKJV). And in that spirit, Steve embraced Rachael as his own, and we have since adopted a wonderful older son, Deshawn. Today, we celebrate nine wonderful years with Rachael, our only daughter. It seems like a bad dream now that we ever considered living without this amazing little girl. She is a constant reminder to us, not of rape but of the startling beauty one can find hidden in tragedy.
Heather Gemmen is the author of Startling Beauty: My Journey from Rape to Restoration (Life Journey, 2004) and the God Allows U-Turns children's series with Alison Gappa Bottke. She lives in Colorado Springs.
This article can be found in Today's Christian April/May 2005 www.todays-christian.com
Steve and I became desperate, and sometimes it's that human desperation that drives us to God. We know Him; we love Him; we say we trust Him. But sometimes we don't cleave to Him as the lover of our souls until we find ourselves completely helpless. As for the fairness of being victimized, we have to realize that ever since sin began there have been victims. Cain slew Abel (Gen. 4:1-8). Amnon raped Tamar (2 Sam. 13:1-22). But what should the victims and their families do with their pain? Do they resort to their own devices, or do they give it to God and His will? Steve and I initially resorted to our own devices by trying to prevent a life that we thought would be inconvenient, given the circumstances. We could never love the attacker's child, we reasoned. So we put our own hand to the situation. But God loved us enough to thwart our plans. Gradually, as the child in my body grew, both Steve and I began to change. It was a spiritual work, and we knew it. We grew attached to the little life inside me and delighted in its movements, just as we had marveled at the evidence of life when I carried Chad and Simon. This child was alive! It was a miracle that the child had escaped death. It became clear that the baby was God's child first, and it was as innocent as those conceived any other way. We grew astonished and ashamed that we could have ever imagined not keeping the baby. We continually repented of our lack of trust in God; of putting our hand to the situation when it should have been left to God all along, and when we discovered the child was a girl, it became even more special. I particularly had wanted a daughter. The adoption was off. When Rachael was born, a light went on in our family. We learned the true meaning of the Father's love. He looks upon us with more than acceptance-He embraces us wholeheartedly, because He has called us His children. "For you did not receive the spirit of bondage again to fear, but you received the Spirit of adoption by whom we cry out, 'Abba, Father'" (Rom. 8:15, NKJV). And in that spirit, Steve embraced Rachael as his own, and we have since adopted a wonderful older son, Deshawn. Today, we celebrate nine wonderful years with Rachael, our only daughter. It seems like a bad dream now that we ever considered living without this amazing little girl. She is a constant reminder to us, not of rape but of the startling beauty one can find hidden in tragedy.
Heather Gemmen is the author of Startling Beauty: My Journey from Rape to Restoration (Life Journey, 2004) and the God Allows U-Turns children's series with Alison Gappa Bottke. She lives in Colorado Springs.
This article can be found in Today's Christian April/May 2005 www.todays-christian.com
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Sunburned and Satisfied
What an awesomely beautiful day. I worked outside nearly all day and am feeling rather toasty tonight. I really needed that sunshine! Tomorrow I don't have to work for Diane, so I get to do some more yard work. Maybe I can get in shape this summer.
My mom is probably coming on Saturday. Haven't seen her for a few weeks.
Will seems to really like his job. I'm SO glad. He David Nissley and his dad are trying to expand our Window Cleaning business too. I think they could really do a lot with that. They want to get into Reno and maybe even up in Lake Tahoe. It's to bad that everybody has to be insured these days. That sure can be expensive, but it will definitely help boost our clientele.
My mom is probably coming on Saturday. Haven't seen her for a few weeks.
Will seems to really like his job. I'm SO glad. He David Nissley and his dad are trying to expand our Window Cleaning business too. I think they could really do a lot with that. They want to get into Reno and maybe even up in Lake Tahoe. It's to bad that everybody has to be insured these days. That sure can be expensive, but it will definitely help boost our clientele.
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
EGGstravaganza!
David brought home a dozen and a half of assorted eggs. I decided to try to hatch them in the incubator that my mom let me borrow. So, we shall see.... Don't ask me what I'm planning to do with 4 turkeys, 3 ducks, a chicken, and a handful of geese! I'm sure that they won't all hatch, but it's worth a try :) . My mom hatched a few duck eggs a few months ago and ended up with one lonely duckling.
Also speaking of babies, I started a bunch of seeds in little containers last night. Flowers are so expensive to buy so I wanted to start my own. I planted some tomatoes, broccoli and things like that.
I'm really getting anxious to be outside. This blustery weather sure is depressing... brr!
I think it should be nice the next few days.
I have had a lot of feathered visitors at my bird feeders. Mostly yellow headed blackbirds, but even those are pretty to watch. William thinks that it's his DUTY to shoot them with the BB gun. Whatever. They don't bother me. I actually think that they know when he's getting ready to shoot them. They all seem to disappear. :)
Also speaking of babies, I started a bunch of seeds in little containers last night. Flowers are so expensive to buy so I wanted to start my own. I planted some tomatoes, broccoli and things like that.
I'm really getting anxious to be outside. This blustery weather sure is depressing... brr!
I think it should be nice the next few days.
I have had a lot of feathered visitors at my bird feeders. Mostly yellow headed blackbirds, but even those are pretty to watch. William thinks that it's his DUTY to shoot them with the BB gun. Whatever. They don't bother me. I actually think that they know when he's getting ready to shoot them. They all seem to disappear. :)
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
CHOCOLATE REVEL BARS - TRY 'EM!
3 cups quick oats
2 1/2 cups flour
1tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
MIX AND IN ANOTHER BOWL COMBINE:
1 cup butter
2 cups brown sugar
2 eggs
2 tsp vanilla
ADD DRY INGREDIENTS AND COMBINE:
PRESS 2/3 OF DOUGH INTO A 9X13
MELT:
1 1/2 cups chocolate chips
1 can sweentend condensensed milk
2 tbs butter
1/2 cup walnuts
2 tsp vanilla
SPREAD OVER DOUGH PRESSED INTO PAN AND BLOB REMAINING
DOUGH ON TOP TO COVER
BAKE @ 350 FOR 25-30 MINUTES
COOL, CUT AND ENJOY!
THESE ARE WILL'S FAVORITE :)
WHOOPIE!
Will got hired on a Les Schwab!! Yeah! I'm totally thrilled. Today is day #2 and he seems to really like it. There are a lot of people out there who are unemployed with the economy the way it is, so we have MUCH to be thankful for. It seems like a good place to work with highly motivated people. And.... he looks really good in his work uniform!
Friday, April 10, 2009
A Worried Wife
Yesterday, Nicole and I went to Reno and had a really good day. When I came home William was not here. Not really that unusual, but I did wonder where in the world he went to. And of course he forgot his cell phone!!! I think I should permanently embed it into his body!
After a while, I listened to the answering machine and he had an important phone call that he needed to return, so of course I tried to get a hold of him. I noticed his gun was gone and some shells so maybe he was with his cousin Daniel.. Nope, he hadn't seen him. He wasn't at his mom's and wasn't at his aunt and uncles.... Where in the world was he?
Of course I am a worry wart, but when everyone else seemed to be tripped out and time went on I starting really wondering. You know how that is when the worst thoughts start getting the best of you....
When Leslie called and started inquiring and said they would go look for him I really got worried. I hate that feeling... What if?....
Jeff called and well... he was walking and all the way to the Highway!! Ha Ha! He really should have had to walk all the way home... maybe that would have helped to remember his cell phone in the future!! Stuck up to the doors of his truck in mud he had to walk out and made it almost 3/4 of the way home!
Who said that a worried woman isn't a helpful woman? Good thing we have a natural inclination to worry!:)
After a while, I listened to the answering machine and he had an important phone call that he needed to return, so of course I tried to get a hold of him. I noticed his gun was gone and some shells so maybe he was with his cousin Daniel.. Nope, he hadn't seen him. He wasn't at his mom's and wasn't at his aunt and uncles.... Where in the world was he?
Of course I am a worry wart, but when everyone else seemed to be tripped out and time went on I starting really wondering. You know how that is when the worst thoughts start getting the best of you....
When Leslie called and started inquiring and said they would go look for him I really got worried. I hate that feeling... What if?....
Jeff called and well... he was walking and all the way to the Highway!! Ha Ha! He really should have had to walk all the way home... maybe that would have helped to remember his cell phone in the future!! Stuck up to the doors of his truck in mud he had to walk out and made it almost 3/4 of the way home!
Who said that a worried woman isn't a helpful woman? Good thing we have a natural inclination to worry!:)
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
My Garden
I'm so exited to start digging in the dirt this year. Today Adam, a single guy in our church, came over and labored all day to get my garden tilled! What a blessing!! He really knows what it is to serve others.
I plan to do it a little bigger this year and plant lots of potatoes and other things. It's like Adam said, " There's nothing quite so pretty as a well tended veggi garden... even prettier than a flower garden". I agree to a point... although I love flowers too!!
My grandma Marilyn has a lovely yard full of flowers and all sorts of other things. I'd like to say that my green thumb comes from her. She really is amazing and puts some much care and time into her yard.
Little plants are almost like little people.... It's just so much fun to nurture them and help them to grow. And then it's so fun to reap and share the benefits! EAT MORE VEGGIES!
I plan to do it a little bigger this year and plant lots of potatoes and other things. It's like Adam said, " There's nothing quite so pretty as a well tended veggi garden... even prettier than a flower garden". I agree to a point... although I love flowers too!!
My grandma Marilyn has a lovely yard full of flowers and all sorts of other things. I'd like to say that my green thumb comes from her. She really is amazing and puts some much care and time into her yard.
Little plants are almost like little people.... It's just so much fun to nurture them and help them to grow. And then it's so fun to reap and share the benefits! EAT MORE VEGGIES!
Friday, April 3, 2009
Jesus' Bride
Is it possible to love God and not His people? Can you imagine marrying somebody but only in thought and not in reality. You knew that you were married, and you even said that you loved that person, but you really could care less if he lived with you or not. That is how it is when we dismiss the need for His body, the Church, in our lives. Recently I had a special time of talking and praying with a dear friend and sister. My burdens were lifted and her needs were met. It was such an awesome experience. It's easy to hide away in our shells and not share with others about our lives and then the problems seem to compound and there it's easy to be content with our misery. But what a sweet release when we can SHARE in one anothers burdens. And help to make the load lighter for eachother!
Aunt Kim and Uncle Joe
This week my Aunt Kim and Uncle Joe called and said they were coming to Reno to do a little shopping. I haven't seen my aunt for almost 2 years. She has been battling breast cancer and is currently on her 4th round of Chemo therepy. She really has gone through it, but it seems like she stays optimistic. I thought she looked good and pray that she will get better.
They picked me up and the three of us and their dog Truman ( a very plump, and stinky bulldog) crammed into their two seater pickup and did some shopping. We met William and they treated us to dinner at Chili's.
They picked me up and the three of us and their dog Truman ( a very plump, and stinky bulldog) crammed into their two seater pickup and did some shopping. We met William and they treated us to dinner at Chili's.
Thursday, April 2, 2009
A little bit of an intro..
Well... how do I begin? How about with WELCOME to my blog! For those of you who don't know me or haven't seen me for years maybe I'll begin with a little intro.... Well, I'm female, 26, married, a born again Christian and happy. My husband is William Lawrence Kellington. He is my best friend and love of my life. We live in the beautiful Sierra Valley, in a little northern California town called Beckwourth. We have a blue healer mix dog, Riley and a little mustang horse named Susie. Life is simple, but good.While we love this beautiful area, and being near family, we've been considering moving. We're not sure yet, but would enjoy living in an area with more opportunities for work.We go to a small Christian Home church with about 5 families. Fellowship is close and the Word of God is so important to Christian living. "Seek Him while He may be found! Call upon Him while He is near!"
A Little More About Mr. Kellington
William and I have been friends for a long time. His family was always close to me and even though Will and I are six years apart he and I just always hit it off. We spent long hours on the phone talking, horseback riding ( him teaching me), and for some reason he was the one with whom I could talk to about all the things in my life. And of course the inevidable happend - he wanted to date me! Yikes!! It was a big decision, but I could not imagine my life with out him.... And so yes, when he got a little older we dated. We pretty much knew that it would end in marriage so... less than a year later we tied the knot! He was 18 and I 24...
It was a lovely July afternoon. Not too hot, and not windy. We had a lot of friends and family come. I don't even know how many there were, but the church was pretty full. Mose Stolzfus from Charity Christian Fellowship in PA flew all the way out with his wife and married us. My sister Caitlin, Will's cuz Hannah and Sis Bonnie were my bridesmaids and Will's cuz James, friend David and Bro. Wesley were his groomsmen.
We headed over the mountain for our honeymoon. Stayed the night in Truckee and drove down to Clear Lake to the family cabin to stay a couple of nights. It was really relaxing. We rented a boat and went tubing - but unfortunatly ended up in a citation since we didn't have a 3rd person along to spot us!!! What a bummer. Had we known... It was great. We headed over to Fort Bragg, Cal and stayed awhile. We ate out, went horse back riding on the beach and enjoyed ourselves. We drove up 101 and visited my sister and looped back up to home. It was fun and made some great memories.
We bought a travel trailer to live in for a while, and since he was working for a friend near Auburn we parked it in a trailer park in Georgetown. I remember wondering where in the world he was taking me when we drove there for the first time together. It was very, very far back in the sticks. We lived there for a few months, but soon decided to go back up and live near family. And so here we are.... for now.
And a little more about William, his humor is surely Kellington. He's a really funny guy and loves to tease... He's got a great talent working with horses. I am amazed when I watch him train. He started a successful Window Cleaning business last year and is still trying to find his nitch in life... He loves Mexican food, music, and movies. And is learning to play the guitar. He already is a successful harmonica player! He really learns fast..... What more is there to say??? Getting married to him is one of the best things that has ever happend to me!
It was a lovely July afternoon. Not too hot, and not windy. We had a lot of friends and family come. I don't even know how many there were, but the church was pretty full. Mose Stolzfus from Charity Christian Fellowship in PA flew all the way out with his wife and married us. My sister Caitlin, Will's cuz Hannah and Sis Bonnie were my bridesmaids and Will's cuz James, friend David and Bro. Wesley were his groomsmen.
We headed over the mountain for our honeymoon. Stayed the night in Truckee and drove down to Clear Lake to the family cabin to stay a couple of nights. It was really relaxing. We rented a boat and went tubing - but unfortunatly ended up in a citation since we didn't have a 3rd person along to spot us!!! What a bummer. Had we known... It was great. We headed over to Fort Bragg, Cal and stayed awhile. We ate out, went horse back riding on the beach and enjoyed ourselves. We drove up 101 and visited my sister and looped back up to home. It was fun and made some great memories.
We bought a travel trailer to live in for a while, and since he was working for a friend near Auburn we parked it in a trailer park in Georgetown. I remember wondering where in the world he was taking me when we drove there for the first time together. It was very, very far back in the sticks. We lived there for a few months, but soon decided to go back up and live near family. And so here we are.... for now.
And a little more about William, his humor is surely Kellington. He's a really funny guy and loves to tease... He's got a great talent working with horses. I am amazed when I watch him train. He started a successful Window Cleaning business last year and is still trying to find his nitch in life... He loves Mexican food, music, and movies. And is learning to play the guitar. He already is a successful harmonica player! He really learns fast..... What more is there to say??? Getting married to him is one of the best things that has ever happend to me!
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